In 2002 when Shania Twain‘s alleged tracklisting for her Up! album leaked I don’t think I’ve ever been more excited about hearing a collection of songs. No, now don’t be silly, I wasn’t, and am not, a huge Shania fan or anything, but when you read a proposed tracklisting that consists of titles like: Thank You Baby (For Making Me Come So Soon); Waiter! Bring Me Water!; I’m Not in the Mood (To Say No!) and In My Car (I’ll Be the Driver), you can almost piss yourself with excitement at the thought of a major international pop artist throwing away the rulebook and choosing comedy over quality.

Where’s Shania today? Oh, she’s OUTSIDE THE BOX. Of course, these tracks all turned out to be pedestrian country-pop throwbacks, but at least the signs were there that Twain understood the importance of a stand-out song title.

Recycling is boring

You know what I mean. Oh look, let’s hear the latest single from No Direction, or Fiona Lewis, or any other made up derivative of an existing pop act, who churn out single after single with titles like “I Love You”, or “Girl”, or “Stay”, which are created under the standard process of recycling the same unimaginative, generic verbs and nouns. Mainstream pop is the most guilty genre of this crime, and presumably this is because the pop market essentially aims to please everyone at the same time.

But it doesn’t have to be this way. That’s right Fiona Lewis, in 2005 The Cardigans dropped an unexpected Personality Bomb on us with I Need Some Fine Wine And You, You Need To Be Nicer, which narrates the turbulent relationship of a dysfunctional couple who get drunk and then angry at each other every night. Kirsty MacColl told it like it was in 1981 with There’s A Guy Works Down the Chip Shop Swears He’s Elvis, and even that dreadful emo act Panic At The Disco got it right one time with There’s a Good Reason These Tables Are Numbered Honey, You Just Haven’t Thought of It Yet.

A good song title doesn’t have to necessarily be long to be interesting either. How I wished that the craze Rihanna started for inanimate objects as song titles had continued after her Umbrella in 2007, but alas, all we got was Eve and her Tambourine later that year.

Music can be a very stale place because once a new idea works commercially, every record company under the sun tries to make a carbon copy. When Britney Spears broke sales records in the first quarter of 1999, what followed was a wave of similar blonde-haired pop wasps, primped and programmed to get in on the honey. (Christina Aguilera, Jessica Simpson, Mandy Moore, Alsou and Ellie Campbell were all launched within a year of Spears) And with the market saturated at the best of times, the least you can do as an artist is to throw an interesting song title into the mix. Should being interesting fail, listen to Shania and never underestimate the power of a well-placed bracket.

Top Ten Song Titles:

Not only are these song titles great, but they also fit the music underneath them. Bingo:

1. Kerry McGregor – A Yodel In The Canyon Of Love
2. The Cardigans – I Need Some Fine Wine And You, You Need To Be Nicer
3. Bobby Womack – If You Think You’re Lonely Now (Wait Until Tonight)
4. The Tamperer featuring Maya – If You Buy This Record Your Life Will Be Better
5. Nancy Wilson – Tonight May Have To Last Me All Of My Life
6. Wayne Carter – My Wife Ran Away With My Best Friend And I Sure Do Miss Him
7. Sufjan Stevens – They Are Night Zombies!! They Are Neighbors!! They Have Come Back From the Dead!! Ahhhh!
8. Kirsty MacColl – There’s A Guy Works Down The Chip Shop Swears He’s Elvis
9. Golden Boy – It’s Good For You To Meet People Like Us
10. Bobby Fuller – I Fought The Law (And The Law Won)

However this one came along today. I just couldn’t help myself.

1. Do the Random Wikipedia Search – The first random wikipedia article you get is the name of your band.
2. Go to Random Quotations – The last four or five words of the very last quote of the page is the title of your first album.
3. Go to the Explore Last Seven Days on Flickr page – Third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.
4. Use Photoshop, Gimp, similar or online free image editing website to put it all together.

This is what I came up with:

• My band is called Behar
• Album is called as we get out of it
• Picture was of New York
• Result is the featured image on post.

Here are some of my friends’ efforts:

There is only one thing to do now. Post yours and share!

10. Foals – Antidotes

Expect the Unexpected with Foals. This is what New Rave wanted to be.

Foals on MySpace

9. TV on the Radio – Dear Science

Some dared proclaim Dear Science as the OK Computer for the naughties. Not convinced, but it does confront the Bush years with stunning tracks and great lyrics. Unlike Radiohead’s best, its poignant, but not suicidal. 

TV On the Radio on MySpace

8. Camphor – Drawn To Dust

Epic. In fact, even more epic than I thought it would be. Oh, and this album would certainly win best use of an orchestra.

Camphor on MySpace

7. Vampire Weekend – Vampire Weekend

Took a few listens, but I eventually fell in love with this africana inspired album from the columbia university chums.

Vampire Weekend on MySpace

6. Third – Portishead

How many of us were scared that this was going to be horrible? Thankfully a massive sigh of relief was heard around the world that the Bristolian’s still have what it takes to be the best.

Portishead on MySpace

5. Nico Muhly – Mother Tongue

I first heard about Nico Muhly in the Guardian, apparently he wants to live his fantasy of going to an English boarding school so he can experience the special relationship between master and schoolboy. hmm.

Nico Muhly on MySpace

4. MGMT – Oracular Spectacular

Pure psychedelic pop. If you’re ever feeling a down, listen to this – Its bizarreness will take your mind off anything. Not only that but the rousing choruses are enough to make anyone cheer up.

MGMT on MySpace

3. Shearwater – Rook

From Austin, Texas – this album is a luscious journey through Americana – with Dulcimers, Glockenspiels, Banjos and Homemade instruments. They also have a drummer/clarinettist called Thor Harris, that looks like Thor. I shit you not.

Shearwater on MySpace

2. Dead Confederate – Wrecking Ball

I’ve talked about this album before. I could talk about how great it is again, but I suggest reading my post about this prog/grunge beast.

Dead Confederate on MySpace

1. Elbow – The Seldom Seen Kid

Maybe I can see the future. When I played this to friends I foretold it would win the Mercury award and despite being released early in 2008, would remain as the best album. Oh how they laughed. Oh how right I was.

The beauty of The Seldom Seen Kid – it feels effortless.

Elbow on MySpace

Song By Toad – Email to Columbia (& Sony BMG) - Music bloggers who have worked hard to promote a band have had their posts taken down by the labels who got them to post them in the first place. Not a way to treat people who do free work for you.

what’s your weather – is it raining again? well let this site choose some music to match your weather.

Allan’s World of Music – Kites in Space – Kites in Space Review - a post about a very good, but also very mysterious band 

Instrument Jokes – Yes, this is on the edge of bad, but there are loads of jokes, mainly about classical music. The highlight for me:

How do you tune a Tuba? With a tuba glue!

passionato – DRM free classical music download shop. Say good-bye to your wallet classical music fans.

pretty much amazing – Dress Up like Kanye West - fulfill the dream and dress follow this step by step guide to be the king of hip hop.

Ear Farm – 8+ “Apparition et scène de Myrtha” by Adolphe Adam: Matt wonders why we have a problem listening to other music

Life’s a Pitch – Blog about Marketing Performing Arts|

Observer Music Monthly – 50 Essential CDs from around the world

Wired: Listening Posts – Top 10 Hottest Music Sites

The Blue Walrus – Summer days through the folkish haze: folk out with this great mp3 compilation.